Friday, August 27, 2010

I Wish I Had Someone to Fight With!!!

It's sort of an odd wish, I know.  You'll understand in minute.

I just got home from another pathetic Friday night of dinner and a movie . . . alone.  I saw The Last Exorcism. I won't give too much away since it just came out but it was definitely an homage to The Blair Witch Project.  And I actually thought it wasn't too bad .... but they botched the ending terribly.  It was an almost plausible plot until the last five minutes.  Anywho... go see it and judge for yourselves. 

So back to that odd headline.  As I was driving home I passed this couple on the sidewalk in front of Starbucks. There was a lot arm waving and other body language going on that would indicate a heated discussion.  "Are they fighting?" I wondered and then I thought "Gee, I wish I had someone to fight with."

Don't misunderstand.  It's not that I actualy desire to argue with anyone. But If I had someone to fight with then at least I'd have someone. At least I'd have some sort of human interaction other than with my co-workes. And if I were fighting with someone then at least I would know that I still had some fire, some passion inside of me.  Being angry with someone right now would be a whole lot better than my current feelings:  defeated ... helpless ... depressed. Somedays the pills work some days they don't. *sigh* That's probably a topic for another post.

I wish I had someone to fight with because it would mean that who I am and what I do mattered to somebody even if only because they disagreed or disapproved. It would mean feeling alive rather than living in paralyzing despair.

See having someone to fight with can be a good thing.


  1. Some posts sadden me but this one is like a cold punch to the gut in the dark. I don't know what else to say. I am so sorry.

  2. You know that saying be careful what you wish for? :) This post made me so sad. I am so sorry.